sometimes it feels like the sorrow will kill me
but it can't
sometimes i wish it would
but it can't
it is there
and i am here
i have managed to kill it
but it returns like christmas returns -
stronger, planarian and even more awful than the time before
one has to live with it somehow - with christmas too
and then the realization that things could be so much worse
and may be even still later today or this evening -
a ferry sinks or worse
it could be worse people say to comfort each other
yes it could and it bloody well will be